Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Warning: depressed rant!

today i question my self worth.. not like "to be or not to be" .. what i mean is that all this petty drama taking place in my life, when does it end? will the madness ever stop? when does it cross the line at petty into down right dangerous. 
by petty drama i mean when will my mother get over the fact that her and my dad are no longer together? why can't she work out her issues and move on? why does she have to bring me down with her? so many more question i could ask but for these i have no answers. I'm all cried out. i can only wear a tired expression. simply because i am tired. I'm tired of all the frustration. .  this may not seem petty but to me, in this situation, you'd think if you weren't happy and you got the chance to start over you would seize the opportunity and create a whole new world for yourself, instead of bringing all your dirty garbage into a new house. (literally!) 

Where is this coming from, you ask? Maybe your not ever asking that. Don't you just love how I assume that you care about my stupid problems? Ha. Assume nothing! I should know that by now.. any who.. if you do care I'll tell you where this is all coming from. A condensed version of course. 

I'm graduating in June. Thank you Lord. 
I have eight tickets. 
I have more than eight people that want to sit in the heat and watch me snatch my diploma away from the principle. 
The biggest problem... my dad wants to bring his girlfriend. 
Doesn't bother me.. she is nice.
Bothers my mother.. she is being a bitch.
My mother came in the door screaming at me about it yesterday.
I left and ran to my dads ( I wanted to go to granny's but she wasn't home.. I just had to get out)
There of course is more to this story but you can fill in the blanks.. Its tiring to relive it all again. But the worst part is yet to come because when I got home last night she didn't say anything to me. Same this morning. Which I know what will probably happen.. but that won't be enough. Not this time.

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