Yesterday I had an appointment with a shrink who comes to the counseling center a couple of times a month to prescribe drugs to sad people at Pembroke and make sure nobody is checking out early.
One of the questions she asked me was:
" Do you have any hobbies or anything you really like to do. like listening to music or watch movies?"
I responded with "Yes. I love listening to music and I love watching Netflix (thank you Rachel!)"
Then she asked: "Do you still find enjoyment when you do these things?"
And, almost shamefully, I had to think for just a second. Do I really still find enjoyment in things I claim to "love".
I answered: "Yes."
This morning I was thinking about this while I was walking across campus. And I had a revelation of sorts, I do find enjoyment in the little things. Like a Tom Petty record, grass (yes, grass), the water fountain at school, the library, Elana becoming a Vampire,.. and so on. That may come across as generic, but life sucks sometimes. (Well, you already knew that.) But sometimes, for me, the windshield of life becomes so foggy that everything constantly sucks and its hard to find hope or enjoyment in anything. So when I can see green grass, the water fountain, and the sunlight hitting is just right so that it looks like everything is glowing (release barf bag now. lol.) its nice to just take a breath and know that there is a glimmer of hope and enjoyment.