Friday, February 26, 2010

12:38 a.m

"stuck, afraid, annoyed by the little things.
 these "not so real" feelings catch up with me at the most inconveinent times.
bubbley joy should be pouring out of me, but i feel not so bubbley. like a bottel of champange gone very bad.

life busy rushing like the blood runnig out of an open wound.
we run and run trying to find a way out, finding that next high, the nexy time we can feel some releif. "

 - excert from my journal on 2*20*10

so today.. err yesterday was my birthday.
i am officially 17. joyfull occasion right?
i thought so too. but now i am having second thoughts..
or third thoughts.. however you want to look at it.
people say these are the best years of our lives.. well thats a lie and i dont care who wants to argue against me. most of the time i win anyway :)

im so ready to be out and away i can taste it.. i had this feeling about driving too. and i love driving, love the feeling of having my own car. its great.. some guilt cause i dont pay anything for it, but otherwise great. so i have a pretty good feeling that im going to like being away at college and living on my own..
now i just have to wait unitil its handed to me on a silver platter :)
yes i have very high expectations!

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