"its just one of though days when you don't wanna wake up, everything is fucked, everybody sucks!"
words i live by the past few days. i think am going to take a trip back to my hole. i ventured out and the sun is starting to burn.
my stomach hurts, my chest is in a knot my hands are sweaty, my feet are ready to run far away! i cant run though. i have duties to attend to. my worldly reliance's are gone. in the trash, far away... however there is one thing i have saved for very desperate times, and i tell you my friends i am feeling very very desperate. weather i will engage is undecided.
a kiss on the cheek, a stab in the back, a blow to the face, these are the things that make the world go round. i wake up to a tear stained pillow. when i cry in my sleep it hurts to wake up in the mornings. to know that i have to face the world again seems like the biggest challenge of all.
fight fight fight!
i will destroy the enemy. or destroy myself in the process. the fight is long and hard but i will strive.
the enemy is beautiful, ugly, skinny, fat, little manhood, big girlhood, brown hair, blue eyes, smart, dumb, funny, not so much, it inhabits this world everyday shaking up my life!
today i cried. i laughed, i got aggravated, i calmed down.
i am yearning for escape... but to where?